Nobody ever has any time. I don’t have time, my friends don’t have time, my cat doesn’t even seem to have the time. No, seriously, he can’t be bothered. There was even a recent film premise where, in the future, time was currency. It starred Justin Timberlake, no; I didn’t see it, that’s beside the point. I think it was called…wait for it…”In Time.” The point is that with time scarce enough for Hollywood to make a crappy film about, it must be important enough to spend wisely. Right? Right.

So, how am I going to spend my time? Well, for starters I’m going to spend as little of it in that over-crowded Hollywood meat market of a gym that I am a member of and as much of it getting fit elsewhere (notice how I didn’t say “staying in shape”).

My friends and Mr. Nugget (my cat) say that I’m too honest. I don’t believe you can be “too” honest. And, too spite all of the aforementioned, and in the spirit of said honesty I would like to get a few things out in the open:

1. I make my living as a fashion model.
2. I fight crime by night.
3. I am clumsier than the average human so anything I can do you can do (except the crime fighting that required special training in a Himalayan monastery).
4. I love being in nature, it keeps me sane.
5. I wear my heart on my sleeve.
6. I’m trying to win my ex boyfriend back (or just make him jealous, really jealous!).
7. Like all of you and Justin Timberlake I have little time.

The nice folks over at Burton have given me the opportunity to combine all of the above into one weekly, outdoor, adventure, nature loving, crime fighting, time and sanity saving, ex-lover vexing blog. So here goes:

For my first excursion I decided I would take my friend stand up paddling in Malibu. I packed a lunch and some important essentials in a backpack and headed to the beach. I had been paddling once before and despite the protests of my friend (oh ye of little faith) I decided to bring our lunch out to sea, an ocean picnic, if you will. I was fairly certain of my paddling prowess and assured my friend I could bring a backpack and not bail and soak everything inside. It was wishful thinking to say the least. In my defense even though I fell in several times (2 = a couple, 3 = a few, 3 or more = several) I was thoughtful enough to pack the food in airtight containers so we were able to eat. Future paddlers take note.

After a few miles along the Malibu coast we paddled deep into the ocean away from the waves where the water is calmer. We attached our boards together like a raft and drank some coconut water and ate lasagna. The panoramic view is breathtaking. On one side Catalina rises elegantly out of the Pacific while the Santa Monica Mountains grace you on the other.

With the sun setting we decided to make our way back to shore. Along the way we were enticed to stop once more, this time docking our boards in a huge kelp bed near some rocks. The hope was that we would be able to get to see some marine wildlife up close. You know like dolphins, or seals…not sharks. Sure enough some curious seals came over to check us out. Which brings me to the part about why I love paddle boarding so much. I love paddling boarding so much because it really gives you the ability to be THAT close to nature. I think that’s at least in part because it doesn’t require a lot of equipment, there is no noise, little hassle and very little footprint. That’s the goal right? To get into nature as seamlessly as possible?

To top it all off all you really won’t find a better core workout. It’s not like canoeing where you are limited to the use of your shoulders and arms. Paddling properly requires a twisting motion, engaging your abs and core to move forward. With the ocean to distract you from the work you’re putting in you can do it for hours. You pay the next day, but the look on your ex’s face when they see your ripped abs will be worth the pain.

All in all I would say the trip was a success. Hey, you can’t get to heaven without a few wet backpacks…

Below is a brief description of proper Stand Up Paddling, or SUP, form:

The proper form for paddle surfing requires a paddle of the correct length and size. A common rule of thumb is a “shaka” length, or 5 to 7 inches, above the rider’s height. While standing on board, the rider holds the paddle with one hand on the handle and the other hand approximately 1/3 of the way down the shaft. The hand placement alternates depending on what side the rider is paddling on. When paddling on the right side the handle is held with the left hand and the shaft with the right, vice versa on the left side. When paddling, the blade is placed in the water 1 to 2 feet in front of the rider. The paddle is then pulled through the water with a motion similar to the rider punching with the top hand. The motion is continued until the blade is pulled through the water to a point approximately 6 inches to a foot behind the rider’s body.

Enjoy and good luck!